“Oh man! You really should have gone on Splash Mountain! You get up to the hill and then, the drop just takes your breath away. Are you SURE you don’t want to go on it with us again? You’re not going to sit out on everything today are you?”

I’ve heard that sort of thing numerous times growing up, and I still overhear that sort of thing every time I go to a Theme Park. While many see this as a petty or irrational fear, those with the fear do not see it as petty. For them, it is very real.

Whether it’s Splash Mountain, Big Thunder, Space Mountain, Rock n’ Roller Coaster, Tower of Terror, or even It’s a Small World, chances are that at least one member of your party will not want to go on a couple rides that everyone else wants to go on.

And you know what? That’s okay.

It seems that those wanting to go on those types of attractions feel almost a duty to have everyone in their group experience the “great” sensations and experiences that they do while on that attraction. Most of the time it’s not done out of spite, but rather an underlying urge to force that one person past their “silly fear” and experience it, with the expectation that once on the attraction they will love it.

What actually ends up happening is that the “convincing” often starts as an argument for why they should ride with everyone else, and can end up at the point of mockery.

The worst part is, that person that doesn’t want to ride will either capitulate out of shame and hate the entire experience no matter how good the attraction, or they will have a cloud of shame and even guilt over them for the rest of the vacation.

I should know: I was one of them.

Growing up, I didn’t ride anything faster than the drop in the Pirates of the Caribbean. Yes, you heard me correctly, that little teeny tiny drop in Pirates.

Of course now, I’m about 65% “cured” of my fear of thrill rides... but there’s a LOT I need to explain of that statement.

First off (and most importantly), I didn’t have to be “cured.” If someone is afraid of certain rides or experiences that they would get from such rides (such as speed, acceleration, dropping, heights, spinning, darkness, close spaces, things popping out, etc.), then there is no reason in the world that should feel pressured to “cure” themselves of that fear. If they can feel like they had a wonderful time with their friends and family without those specific experiences, then that’s okay.

Secondly, it took me a long time to get from where I was to where I am now, and that was completely thanks to my wife who has a degree in Psychology. She actually created a program of “stepping stones” for me to accomplish, going on to more intense rides each time, all the while using psychological visualization exercises to help me along.

An example of this would be before I went on Big Thunder Mountain, I would see myself walking through the queue line, waiting for the train, and then getting in the train. If I at any point I felt anxious, I could open my eyes and start over again. The idea is that by seeing yourself do it in your head over and over, the visual stimulation of actually doing it would seem less daunting. After that, I would walk the entire queue line with her, and then not board the train at the end.

While that program worked for me, there are still several attractions that I still do not go on. ...and again, that’s okay. When I feel that the time is right, I’ll pick back up and start the program where I left off.

Which is the most important part of conversing with that one person who doesn’t want to ride: respecting their wishes the first time. Even if you can’t stand the fact that they will be missing whatever, by pushing them to do it, you’ll actually be creating more stress and anxiety, which in the end will make it even harder for them to ride if they wanted to.

For people like me, they MUST be in control of their decision to ride, free of any influences. Once they feel free to choose to ride or not without any judgment from others, then they will be free to have a good time.

If they were to go on the ride of their own free will, it would only happen after the decision was completely up to them, free of any judgment. Some do feel a sense of adventure once they realize that they could walk away without any judgment, and take it upon themselves to ride just because they want to be spontaneous and try something new.

When in a group and this situation arises where one member doesn’t want to ride, leave it at that and just say “okay.” That person may even want to know what the ride was like afterwards, and make sure you’re honest with them. That respect of their fear and your understanding will go a long way.

So next time you’re at the Disney-MGM Studios and you want to ride Tower of Terror, I’ll be having a blast laughing my head off at MuppetVision 3D. We’ll both be having a good time and besides, I was one less person you didn’t have to wait behind in line.

Thanks for stopping on by, and I’ll see you next week!