You all know where I stand.

Not long ago, I admitted giving a teeny "shove'' to a boy who got between me and Mickey Mouse at Walt Disney World.

Now, you might think being a scary Disney person is lonely.

You would be wrong.

There are lots of them out there. They are all scary.

And they are writing to me.

"No one understands we live to hug a big duck or shake hands with a mouse in pants,'' they say. "But you, Boomer Gal, you have set us free!''

I am not comfortable with so much adoration.

Not to mention weirdness.

But if the other scary Disney people want to worship me, who am I to stand in the way?

There were two, especially, who impressed me with their scariness.

They're obsessed with ducks of every kind, including Disney's Donald Duck.

And you gotta love that.

Their names are Julie and Paul. They are baby boomers who live in Florida. They have both been duck fans since they were kids.

Julie tells me they even raised a duck on their lanai. The duck's name is Oscar.

We pause here so I can say something to Julie.

Dear Julie: I am in upstate New York. We go outside three days a year. Nobody has a duck on a lanai. I'm not even sure what a lanai is, but it sounds like something Floridians brag about to New Yorkers so New Yorkers will move to Florida and then Floridians can move to Mali Mali, which is even warmer than your stupid Florida.

Love, your friend, Boomer Gal.

OK, back to our story.

Oscar the Lanai Duck followed Paul and Julie around, learned to jump up steps and even throw himself into a tub of water.

Julie and Paul hoped sparks would fly between Oscar the Lanai Duck and the Lonesome Widow Duck that lived on a pond in their community.

With no winter to worry about, Floridians have time to play Cupid for ducks.

Well, Oscar turned out to be an "Oscarette'' and the love story had an unhappy ending.

And what, you may ask, does Oscar the Lanai Duck have to do with Disney World?

Keep your pants on, people, we're getting there.

We know besides loving Oscar the Lanai Duck, Paul also loves Donald Duck.

But he didn't have much luck finding him on trips to Disney.

Finally, during one visit, Paul and Julie came around a corner and, as Julie tells it:

"There he was … in all his four-foot glory.''

That's when a kid jumped Paul in the line.

Paul leaned down, lifted the kid up under the armpits and put him back in his place.

Nobody knows what became of this kid.